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This man that I'm with has pro ...
untitled / Married Life / 10:50 PM - Sunday May 11, 2008
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A Thinker (Female, 26-28) asked:


This man that I'm with has proposed to me on my birthday and we've been together for 5 months. He wants me to say yes but I think it's way too early. I don't think I'm ready. He's so good to me. I don't want to rush things. What should I do?


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A Sweet Sarah (Female, Charlotte, Who Cares?, Self-Employed) answered:

Screenname: smartblond


nope.. if you are not 100% NO.. its way too early.. take your time

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A Thinker (Female, 29-35, Executive) answered:


I think if you're still calling him "this man" it's too soon.

I know it takes me about a months or two to stop refering to the guys I'm dating by their last name when I'm telling my family and friends :)

... so I figure "this man" is definatly a bit too soon.

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A Thinker (Female, Atlanta, 36-45) answered:

Screenname: sincerity


Sounds like you already know the answer. You said you don't want to rush things. It's true that your age is more mature and insightful than a 22 year old, but 5 months is still not long enough to get to know the real person. Tell him you REALLY like him but 5 months is just too soon to be discussing marriage. REassure him you're enjoying getting to know him.

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An Intellectual Guy (Male, San Francisco, 56-65) answered:

Screenname: chesterdad


Tell him, he's allowed to ask three (diferent) times before your answer is final.

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A Creative (Female, Philadelphia, 46-55, Retail) answered:

Screenname: westhawk959


Trust your instincts. It is way too soon. If the two of you are meant to be together, then there is no need to rush.

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A Hip-Hop Girl (Female, Los Angeles, 29-35, Administrative) answered:

Screenname: proudlatina


tell him just that, you're not ready, you're not trying to rush into things, its waaaaaaaaay to early in the relationship. good luck

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A Married Girl (Female, 29-35, Administrative) answered:

Screenname: divatoonami


You just said that you are not ready. Don't let him pressure you...or if you say yes...doesn't mean you have to get married...right now...you can have a long engagement.....but if you are not ready to get married...then what else are you suppose to do? Not get married!

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A Career Woman (Female, New York, 56-65, Therapist) answered:

Screenname: helper123


I think that if you have any reservations at all you need to voice them. Marriage is too important a step to give in to a request because you feel bad not to. If he loves you he will wait. You are young so there shouldn't be a hurry. You can also tell him that you want to date a while longer to get to know each other better and go from there.

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A Life of the Party (Female, Indianapolis, 46-55, Administrative) answered:

Screenname: kmf1


Sounds pretty controlling. If he is truly a good guy and what you want in a husband, get engaged. No one ever said you can't have a LONG engagement.....

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