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Go or not?
Go or not? / Family & Parenting / 2:47 AM - Saturday May 17, 2008
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(Female, 29-35) asked:


Im 29 and a Doctor and for cultural reason I still live with family, my BF is asking me to go visit him and stay for a couple of days, my parents are going out of town so I might have a chance to do so but I am a little scared... beside the comment of me being a total looser for still living with my parents and stuff... do u think I should go for it??


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A Trendsetter (Female, 36-45, Retail) answered:

Screenname: msgg


Um, you do not fall into the loser category. You are honoring your parents by respecting their wishes. The definition of a loser is not someone who has completed college, has a degree to practice medicine and honors their cultural beliefs by obeying their parents.
How long have you and your boyfriend been together as a couple? Do your parents approve of the relationship?

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A Thinker (Female, San Francisco, 36-45, Technical) answered:

Screenname: meowmeowww


LOSER...not looser

you are an adult and if you are a practicing doctor with a paycheck you should move out and live on your own---then you do not have to sneak around.

I am assuming you live in the US...if so---time to grow up and be on your own

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A Creative (Male, 46-55, Alternative Medicine) answered:

Screenname: winterhaven


The word is "loser', doc. Isn't English required anymore?

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A Career Man (Male, Los Angeles, 46-55, Who Cares?) answered:

Screenname: buffer


Do what you feel comfortable with, not what you think will make your parents happy.

Just think, if everybody was so concerned about the culture you'd all be back in that country living that culture....It's a lot more fun here isn't it.

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A Thinker (Female, 46-55, Who Cares?) answered:

Screenname: spitfire815


It depends on how well u know ur s/o..How long are u with him.
Otherwise GO FOR IT!!!!!! Live alittle, take chances & most important, HAVE FUN:=)

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A Mr. Nice Guy (Male, Detroit, 36-45, Artist / Musician / Writer) answered:

Screenname: superbussell


the man that calls you a loser is wanting you to spend the night a few nights for a lot of sex hmmmmm . are you desperate or hard up for attention? being an intelligent woman "Doctor" , to be close to your family doesn't make one a loser. in fact i bet you are able to save twice the money he has. maybe you should flirt and share that smile with some new friends during those couple of days

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A Thinker (Female, New York, 46-55, Retired) answered:

Screenname: maryea


You sound torn between always pleasing your parents and living your own life. You can have both by respectfully telling your parents that you are going to stay with your boyfriend for a couple of days! If they truly love and respect you, they must abide by your decisions, just as you respect them by living at home. It will not be easy for you to find Mr. Right without stepping into today's societal values to some degree. But you are much too mature to be lying to your parents. Don't do that to yourself.

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A Thinker (Female, Who Cares?, Who Cares?) answered:

Screenname: barbb


I would think you would want a life of your own and not allow your parents to run your life. You are an adult and a doctor and if you are living in the US then you should begin to follow our customs not that of the country you came from. Why sneak around to do what you want to do. At your age, you shouldn ot allow anyone to live your life for you.

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